Friday, 20 February 2009

Heads, shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes

Flu led to an ear infection led to a strange muscular weakness on the left-hand side of my face led to a trip to the doctor's surgery to make an appointment.

Receptionist: "Shall I write down ear problem?"

Me: "Well, it started out as an ear problem, but now it's more of a facial problem."

Receptionist stares at her diary for a moment and says: "I can't write "facial", the doctor won't know what that means. His English isn't very good."

It wasn't until I left the surgery that I thought about the absurdity of that statement: "The doctor won't know what "facial" means".

I hope that the receptionist was under-estimating the doctor's command of English. Poor conversational and writing skills in a language do not necessarily equate to poor passive language ability. No one knows this better than me – a French to English translator who has never lived in a French-speaking country. My poor French conversational skills are embarrassing given my line of work and would hold me back in some settings, but are not really a problem for me working at home as a freelancer.

Any native French speaker trying to engage me in conversation and listening to me struggle to put together a simple sentence about the weather would snigger if I told them that I had decoded hundreds of French documents about hedge funds and securitisation in a professional capacity. Fortunately, the conversation never progresses to the point where I am asked about my occupation.

Anyway, I hope that's what's going on with my doctor. Otherwise, what other adjectival forms of body parts doesn't he understand? Nasal, cervical, cardiac? And how can I have any confidence in getting an accurate diagnosis?

Update: Delightful doctor.


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